I have always struggled with my weight. Today is literally day 4 of keeping a count on my food and I am trying very hard to keep it to 1800-2000 cals for a start as I do not want to go cold turkey and become a snappy bitch which I am known to become. 4 days later there have already been some ups and downs:
Downs:
The weight - I weighed myself this evening - last time I looked (sometime in March) I was losing weight and had come down to 118 kilos. This evening I took a sneak peak and I am 121.6 kilos. This really gutted me. On the one hand I know I should weigh myself first thing in the morning and all of that but on the other surely I would not be sooo much lighter in the morning!
So I have decided that hubby is to weigh me every morning before I eat anything just for the science of it all. Hubby is a scientist and he reckons everyones journey is different and water retention, weight gain, loss, periods etc is all different. He wants the chance to prove it to me by weighing me over a period of time - perhaps 6 months or so. Maybe this should be his chance and I can take a peak every week or fortnight.
Portions - I have always struggled with portions. I grew up in a culture where portions were big. Everyone in my family (parents house) eats big. Gor example if a brick of ice cream (1 litre) were brought home we would split it 4 ways. When hubby and I got together and were visiting my parents, he was horrified and did his best to not show it. By then my eating habits had improved (read: improved not perfected) and I was also shocked. Portions torment me. I love food. Not only am I an emotional eater, I also have a love for good food. I enjoy food, in particular desserts. So this will need to be reined in. I was drinking less water and eating more bad food. This will change NOW
Fruit - I love fruit. Fruit has sugar. In the past I have been known to eat more than 5 fruit a day. These days I am aiming for one apple and one and a half banana a day. The half comes from the one that goes into my morning oats to sweeten it up as I do not use any sweeteners, sugar or honey (another journey which I will explain one day but something I am rather proud of). The amount of sugar in a measly apple amazes me and annoys me but I am trying not to get tooo ANAL at this stage. I use www.calorieking.com.au to track my food and I find it amazingly helpful. I do not think it is great to track exercise but when I want to track my exercise, I use it to get a rough idea.
Ups:
- I feel energetic
- I am happy
- I am less bitchy
- I am more productive
- I am motivated
- I am gradually becoming more aware of my food intake.
- It is cold and even now I am drinking close to 3 litres of water every day.
- Event though I seem to have gained weight, I actually feel more confident and feel good about myself.
- My skin is sooooo much better. I even got a compliment about it today and this is just a week of being really careful with food and exercise.
Given the ups and downs I have just written about, I think it is a no-brainer that I have to continue this regime. I enjoy getting my arse kicked at the gym and so look forward to it. I go 4 days a week at present but I am going to have to think of other things to do with my family over the weekend so that exercise is not something that I do alone at the gym but something that is a way of life for the family. My hubby loves exercising and I think he feels left out when I tell him all the fun I have had . He is hugely encouraging but I think he really would love to do something together as a regular 'our' thing and quite frankly I think it makes sense. Our little bub will also learn this is our normal life where one does not have to go to seek exercise to lose weight but it is part of a daily routine like brushing our teeth.
I have loads to think of in terms of tightening things up realistically. I do not want to make it too hard to follow so I will have to think carefully and consult with the trainer, hubby, fellow bloggers and their journeys and put something together. So until next time ta ra...xx
